


a drunk mind is a sober heart and my drunk mind wants to climb you

by day



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: All Human, College AU, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, Fluff everywhere, Humor, Kinda nerd!Derek, M/M, and drunk!stiles, drabble kinda, jock!Stiles, loose plot, lots of fluff, mr. harris is the devil but his plans fail and it all turns out well in the end, stiles is finding out his sexuality
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-14
Updated: 2013-03-14
Packaged: 2017-12-05 07:25:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,351
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/720394
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/day/pseuds/day
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Stiles runs into a brick wall that is Derek, he's kissed somewhere in the struggle, and this ends with him questioning his sexuality.</p>
            </blockquote>





	a drunk mind is a sober heart and my drunk mind wants to climb you

“Plagiarism is a very serious issue, Mr. Stilinski.” Mr. Harris drawled with a smug look on his face. “It can get your scholarship revoked and you won't be able to attend any universities in California.”

 

“I didn't cheat.” Stiles spat through gritted teeth. He was both infuriated and oddly flattered that anyone would think his work was good enough to be stolen from someone. Yes, he was an irritable jock who was known for making bad life decisions, but that didn't mean he was a cheat. He was the fucking Sheriff's son, it was literally impounded into him from the moment he was born to respect the laws.

 

“Your work...” And Stiles could literally see the wheels churning in the teachers head as he tried to come up with an insult that would test the limits of being offensive but not enough to have his teaching license revoked. “Has been, well, inadequate this entire year, and suddenly you're churning out papers that are at teaching level? You've been borderline this entire semester. Even Hale couldn't have come up with a paper of this level.”

 

Everyone knew Derek Hale was the smartest in class (and ridiculously attractive if not a bit scary). He never got less than an A on his work, he was in the top 5% of the school, had a full ride scholarship all while maintaining his glorious body (although if asked, Stiles would deny that he noticed).

  
And teaching level work?

 

Yep, Stiles was definitely flattered. He wondered how Mr. Harris would feel once he realized that he was complimenting his student instead of insulting him. But the chances of Stiles getting the biased bastard to acknowledge Stiles' glory was slim.

 

“You do realize that I had to have some intelligence to get into this school. I have a scholarship. And you have to admit, it's pretty amazing for someone to get borderline for all classes. Do you know how hard it was to calculate how much work I had to do to pass?” Stiles admitted. “I'm lazy, I'm not an idiot. I didn't cheat.”

 

“You're on a lacrosse scholarship, Stilinski. There's a difference.” Mr. Harris narrowed his eyes into slits and it made him look even more like a vulture. Stiles fought back the chortle that would infinitely get him into trouble and furthermore portray him as a cheat.

 

“I didn't cheat.” He repeated for the third time, his own eyes beginning to slit. He wasn't an idiot. He had never been an idiot, even if he did nothing to prove that. He barely passed his tests, he turned in the minimal amount of work, he acted out- yes. But if the teachers actually gave a shit about him, if they took the amount of time to realize that there was a reason for everything, they would understand that Stiles was as far from an idiot as you can get. “Give me a zero if that's what you honestly want. You wont find any proof of plagiarism because there isn't any. You can't bring it to the school board. All you can do is fail me. I don't care. I'm late for practice.”

 

As much as he encouraged the respect of teachers and authority, Stiles didn't bother to wait for permission and stormed out of the class without another word.

 

He got to the field with a scowl plastered to his face. “Sorry I'm late.”

 

“Harris hold you back again?” Scott asked, sympathy in his eyes.

 

“Yeah.” Stiles said shortly. It wasn't the first time. The bastard literally nitpicked everything and anything to find something to hold against the hyperactive kid, even if it meant taking time out of his day to hold Stiles after class.

 

He played with anger. Which actually worked out pretty well since Lacrosse was a contact sport, but that only caused his team mates to give him weird looks every time he rammed into them with more force than necessary.

 

Even after 3 hours of running into things and playing with sticks, Stiles was still pissed. He stalked out of the lockers aggressively after an aggressive shower and an aggressive goodbye man-hug with Scott.

 

He rammed into a brick wall and growled. “Fucking fuck-” And oops, that wasn't a wall. That was Derek and holy shit how did he get his muscles like that if all he did was study? “My bad.”

 

“Stiles?” Derek asked. Stiles took a minute to contemplate if Derek was angry or if his eyebrows were just naturally like that before nodding.

 

“Mr. Harris asked me to tutor you.”

 

Stiles scoffed. “That bastard will do anything to belittle me. I got into school on a fucking academic scholarship, not a lacrosse scholarship, and he still doubts my fucking abilities to get something done. I'm. Not. An. Idiot.” He mumbled. Okay so maybe he shouldn't take it out on Derek who was twice Stiles' size, but he was mad and had no self control. If he got pummeled, at least he would have a reason to skip class the next day.

 

“I didn't say-”

 

“Yeah, right, Hale. Everyone in class knows I'm stupid.” Was he being too contradictory? Maybe he should take it down a notch. Eh, he had nothing to lose. “I don't need your pity, thanks, I'm good with being the class idiot. As long as I graduate, I don't care.”

 

Stiles began walking away before Derek was grabbing his arm. He stared at Stiles. “Derek.”

 

Stiles scrunched his eyebrows. “What is this, Tarzan? You Derek, Me Stiles. I can understand full sentences, you know. I'm not actually mentally incapable.” He caught the incredulous look and sighed. “I know your name, Hale.”

 

“Don't call me Hale.” Derek reiterated. “My name is Derek, I don't like being called Hale.”

 

“Well, okay then, _Derek_.” Stiles wasn't angry any more after all the aggressive stomping and the ranting, so he slipped in the Stilinski Cheshire grin. “Tell Harris that I decline the offer. You don't need to put up with me because of his desire to ruin my life.”

 

Aaaaand Derek was now officially manhandling him. Stiles let out a garbled sound before he was being shoved against a wall and kissed. Wait, what the fuck. He shoved Derek off him, his face flaming with anger (he was _not_ flustered, no). “What.”

 

And why the fuck was Derek looking like Stiles was the one who ravished him? “I-”

 

“Stiles?!” Please, please, please let it not be the person he thought it was. One twitch to the left and a flash of blonde hair and all his hopes and dreams were crushed under her stilleto's.

 

“Erica-” Stiles blurted, pushing Derek, who still looked inappropriately scandalized, completely off of him. “Erica, it's not-”

 

“I've always known you were a little gay, but couldn't you have at least broken up with me first?” Erica pursed her red lips.

 

“I didn't- what?” Stiles blanched. “Erica, what. Have you always thought I was gay?”

 

“Don't turn this around on me.” Erica put her hands up. Stiles should be glad she wasn't running off in tears or strangling him like any other girl would, but this was much much worse. “You were the one liplocking with some dude when you had a girlfriend.” Stiles ignored the use of passed tense and scrambled after Erica and left behind the still shocked (seriously?) Derek.

 

Four hours later and he was sitting on a stool piss drunk and glaring at a wall.

 

Someone, Derek, gingerly sat on the stool next to him. Stiles gave him the side eye, made sure there would be no inappropriate advances, before shrugging and ordering a drink for the admittedly guilty looking man.

 

“I'm sorry-”

 

Stiles placed his entire hand on Derek's face in a _shh, don't speak_ manner.

 

“Where's your, uh, girlfriend?” Derek asked around Stiles' hand.

 

Stiles frowned and pulled away, focusing on his beer. “We broke up.”

 

“Oh my God, I am so sorry. I'll explain it to her-”

 

“Nah.” Stiles dismissed. “We were gon' break up anyway. She just used you molesting me as an excuse. She was always the fan of dramatic breakups.”

 

“I'm sorry.” Derek said again. The face he was pulling was seriously not appropriate for that body, oh my god. “I didn't mean to do that- I just, you were looking so upset.”

 

“Do you usually kiss people who look upset?” Stiles snorted. “I wonder what you're like at hospitals or funerals.”

 

“I truly am sorry.”

 

“Oh my God, I know, okay, it's all over your face.” Stiles sighed. “I don't care. But that doesn't mean you can pull shit like that. I get enough shit from my friends for being stupid, I don't want to get harassed for being gay. I mean, there's nothing wrong with it, but I'd like to at least be gay before I'm badgered for being gay? Or maybe I'm already gay so it'll be okay. Wait, what the fuck am I saying, it's never okay to bully someone. Aw, I just made myself angry. People are so mean, I hate people.”

 

“Do you have a ride home?” Derek asked, not knowing how to respond to Stiles rant.

 

“Are you trying to hit on me, Hale? I just told you I don't like dick.” Stiles slurred, frowning aggressively. “Well, I don't think I do. I don't know.”

 

Derek didn't know if he should be flattered that Stiles was questioning his sexuality because of him or horrified that he just forced him into rethinking his sexuality. Stiles didn't give him time to think it over and just grabbed Derek by the face and stared at him. When the staring started to become uncomfortable, Stiles spoke. “Help me figure out if I like guys.”

 

“What.”

 

“Well, you like me.” Stiles face pinched. “I think? And Erica was right, I guess. I've always been a little gay, but I'm totally fine with that. Both genders just means twice the chance of finding someone who will actually tolerate me. You tolerate me. So help me?” Stiles had been questioning his sexuality for a while, actually, but he had been dating Erica and the sex was good but he was also curious about dick and butts so that was a definite alarm that hey, maybe Stiles wasn't completely straight.

 

“What.”

 

“Pretend you love me.” Stiles drawled, “Hold me in your arms, Derek, whisper sweet nothings in my ears! Become the love of my life and the fire of my loins--”

 

“You're drunk.” Derek deadpanned.

 

“Yes.” Stiles nodded. “But drunk words are a sober mind, or was it drunk mind is a sober heart? Well whatever. But Derek I am actually really attracted to you and I am totally okay with that kiss earlier. The timing was a bit off and I would have appreciated warning and maybe if you were a bit more gentle--”

 

“I'm taking you home.”

 

“You're so nice to me.” Stiles grinned drunkenly at the bigger male. “Wait, do you like me though or do you genuinely just kiss everyone who looks sad and I've been reading this entire situation wrong.”

 

Derek's ears were flaming red and he turned away. “I like you. You're- I like you.”

 

“Aw.” Stiles cooed, eyes squinted and a wide smile on his lips. “You're so cute I don't know why I used to think you were scary.”

 

Derek sighed and literally picked Stiles up and carried him to his car. He buckled him into the passengers seat before getting in. “Where do you live?”

 

But Stiles didn't answer because he was already passed out.

 

=

 

Stiles woke up in an unfamiliar bed with a pounding headache and a mouth that tasted like death. He was stripped down to his boxers and he should have been worried that he did something while he was drunk, but he strangely wasn't.

 

That was until he turned to find a shirtless Derek sleeping next to him.

 

“Mother of God!” Stiles blurted in shock and slammed his head against the headboard. Derek jerked awake and flailed to the ground in a heap of naked limbs and blankets. He blearily looked around and when his eyes landed on Stiles he jumped up.

 

“Crap-” Derek started but was interrupted by Stiles breaking out into peals of laughter.

 

“Wolf boxers.” Stiles wheezed, tears blurring his vision. “Oh, my god, that's actually really fitting.”

 

Derek flushed a scarlet red and pulled on his sweats.

 

“I didn't do anything last night, did I?” Stiles asked gingerly. “If I forced you into anything, dude, I'm sorry—”

 

“You forcing me?” Derek's eyebrows raised in disbelief. “I recall being the one kissing you and actually being attracted to males as opposed to being the one who doesn't know who he's attracted to”

 

“I find you really hot though so does that make me gay?” Stiles asked. “Wait no, don't answer that, everyone would find you hot. And oops, I'm totally objectifying you. I'll stop.”

 

“Are you okay though?” Derek asked, running his fingers through his hair. “I kinda caused you to break up with your girlfriend.”

 

“m'fine.” Stiles muttered through a yawn. “Wasn't serious, she already had her claws hooked into some dude named Boyd, it was only a matter of time. I just wish we could have broken up in a way that didn't involve me coming off as a cheater?”

 

“Sorry again.” Derek grumbled.

 

“Seriously, I am perfectly okay with it. Maybe if I get kissed by strangers more often, I'll learn more about myself.” Stiles grinned. “You make things shine with clarity but I am also very confused.”

 

“Not by strangers.” Derek blurted before going scarlet once again. Stiles let out a completely unattractive chortle but Derek wasn't running away and wow, yeah, extending his sexuality out towards men might have actually caused him to find someone who tolerated him after all.

 

“Do you need to go somewhere or are you going to stay for breakfast?”

 

What Stiles heard was: This is your chance to take off running and protect your fragile sexuality but if you stay I will shatter everything you ever knew about yourself.

 

Stiles stayed.


End file.
